Gone Yesterday Hair today!

Look I have hair!!!!

R>I can't beleive how having hair can help me fake looking better then I feel! Don't get me wrong I do wear my bald head as a badge of honor, but when I wear the do rag and mask out in public I don't like the fact that perfect strangers treat me like I am dying! My friend told me today that her little girl Sarah saw me at church and said look Crystee's all better she has hair now, aren't little kids so cute.Well its been a couple of rough weeks I have had to endure some personally humilating moments that I won't go in to details about thank goodness for our oldest daughter Heather who was here to help me. I went to the Doctors today they say my Bone Marrow is dying off and they all seemed thrilled about it so I take it this is good and the chemo is doing it job. They have to wait a couple of weeks for my blood counts to continue going down and then they will give me one last transfusion before they start the growth factor.

>My granddaughter Madi-Lu shows her support for me! !

A couple of weeks ago my good friend told me to start writing a gratitude journal and to find thing in each day to be thankful for. I thought each day would be a very short entry but to my surprise I have a lot to be thankful for,I was just focusing on the wrong things. I won't bore you with the list but I encourage all of you to write down a few things each day you are thankful for and you will blessing how many bleesing you have in even during trails and tribulations. This last week I have had some wonderful and faith building experiences that I would like to share with you. We had the opportunity to go and listen to an Apostle of the Lord Russell M Nelson speak on Sunday. I was so uplifted by his talk and was thankful I went because I almost didn't. At the end of the meeting I had the opportunity to well kind of shake hands with Elder Nelson He noticed my relcuntancy and I explained that my Dr told me not to shake hands and he said well I can give you a hug and he did.He told me that My hevenly Father was aware of me and that my trails and tribulations were for a purpose. Words can not describe the feelings I felt. I am so thankful for my ward family,friends and faimly who continue to serve me.

Take care Crystee

A New Look!

Me and my girls. I am the one sporting the do rag!

I know you are all wondering how I am doing? Well lets just say the release date for Crystee's Funeral "The Musical"has been post pone indefinitely. I was surprised when I logged on to do the update and saw my friend Dawn had added the donating blood blurb and pics,so thank you Dawn! Thank you to my Friends in Auburn for your support!

I started loosing my hair a couple of weeks ago. John says it looks like a goat chewed on my head! and I have to agree with him!

Last week they up my chemo dosage and I am now on the highest dose and will stay on it for 4 months. As you can see it is starting to take its toll on me physically I have been very tired and in some pain. Saturday I went to our Niece Shaina's wedding and enjoyed spending time with Johns family. The best part of the night was when John & I got out on the dance floor, our girls were mortified so I thought that was a perfect ending to a great day.

I woke up one morning and there were more bald patches so Kayla shaved my head!

Yesterday however was a very bad day I was in a lot of pain and nothing seem to work and I was emotionally exhausted. I missed my Mom terribly and the more I missed her the madder I got! I was mad that Heavenly Father took her away from me and that I had to go through this with out her when she was the best care giver ever! I was mad at the stress my illness is causing my youngest daughter.I was mad that my two older sisters lived in other states and that my brother is busy with his family,work and church calling and that my dad is not like my mom. I was truly ready to throw in the towel yesterday.

I tell you this not because I want you to feel sorry for me but so I can tell you what I have learned from my tantrum. First of all like any child who yells at their parent I had to say I was sorry and I did repent to my Heavenly Father I know he loves me and does understand what I am going through. And like my friend told me this morning at least I had a loving and nurturing relationship with my mom cause some people don't have that so I am thankful for that. I have been spoiled in the past by having family close to me so I never had to rely on my church family and find myself in uncharted waters. I am having to learn why we call it a ward family I am so great full for all of you that are in my ward that have help in ways I might not even be aware of so thank you. Thank you to all my friends and family who continue to pray for me and you words of encouragement keep them coming!

Tada! here I am in all my BALD glory! John says he thinks it sexy, I think he maybe crazy!

We donated blood in honor of Crystee!!!!

Ok, so this is not Crystee typing, it's her friend! One of the benefit's of setting up her blog is I have her password...so Crystee I hope you don't mind! Here are some pictures of us donating yesterday, we really livened up the day down at the blood bank with our camera! This is for you Crystee!!!

I am a first timer!!! Look at my fabulous blood!
Heather is more experienced at this, her bag fills up quickly!

Look who we found! Pre. Crabtree has know you since you were a baby and was so happy to get his picture taken for you!
All done, we got these gorgeous 80's pink and green bandages!
& a Cookie!

These girls couldn't make it today, but were with us in spirit. They hold cotton balls on their arms in support!



This is Patty & Alec Howard friends who live in Spokane donating blood!